Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Behind Closed Doors :: New Link Up!

Dog Hair Is An Accessory

What do you and your sig other do that's just crazy? 

That's the question three fab ladies posed to the blog world, and I'm sure they're going to get some great shit on people.

We have lived together since July 2011, and at that time, I wasn't working (shocker, right?  Y'all are just like, does this girl ever work? Has she ever had a job where she received a W-2?) and he was, but then I started commuting about 3x a week to Chicago at night for grad school from Milwaukee, driving back and forth.  So we didn't totally cross paths a lot because he worked 4 am - noon.  We got a couple quality nights a week, but nothing where we were fully exposed to weird habits.

But now, oh now, we are married.  The paper has been signed, rings are exchanged and we're both stuck with each other's filthy-weird habits.

If you read Bryan's post on me the other day, A Q&A with the Mr., you got a pretty good feel for how weird I am.  Seriously I think he better describes me than I could ever describe myself and for now, that post stands as a legit representation of my blog!

My crazy:
  • I leave Kleenexes everywhere.  I blow my nose on the couch, and basically forget about it somewhere on the couch.  I've also been known to fall asleep holding a used Kleenex.
  • I also fall asleep CLUTCHING my glasses.  This is such an extreme problem that I have sleeping glasses and life glasses.  
  • I basically freak out if the dishwasher is full and the sink is full, and everything is dirty.  But then I just hate unloading clean dishes, so I leave it and give up.
  • I buy books on my Kindle using our joint checking debit card and then feign disbelief when asked the next day that I just bought the new Dan Brown novel at 1:00 am.
  • Sometimes, when Bryan is sleeping, I will put my finger under his nose to make sure he is breathing...and sometimes I will stick a little bit of my hair by his nose to sleep-tickle him and really make sure he's alive.  This is bitchy, but also kinda funny, and then when we're both awake I let him do it back to me so we can be even.
His crazy:
  • Socks.  He just takes socks off anywhere and actually throws them.  Says it's a "release" or cleansing routine.  I just find socks everywhere.
  • Bryan will leave a dirty dinner plate on the coffee table (b/c that's where we eat, yes) for like, days.  I cannot stannnndddd this.  How can I use my coffee table for holding a glass of water in the morning if there is a dirty plate on it?  I've wizened up and now I just clear our plates to the sink at night when I'm done eating. 
  • He takes really, really, really long showers sometimes.  I'm happy to have such a clean husband, but honestly, sometimes I feel like I am not clean enough because why does anyone need a 30 minute shower?  
  • Sometimes I have to force-wash his jeans and polos.  Like, he won't just put them in the laundry basket, but tries to re-wear polos for weeks to work that haven't been washed.  Sometimes when he's at work, I will go through everything in the closet, smell it, and wash it if I deem necessary!  And guess what? It's a delightfully received surprise.
  • He quizzes me on if I bought books on my Kindle late at night the next day!!! Just incredible. The nerve.  Yes, I did buy a book called, "Tout Sweet", and no, I have not read it yet, and I'm not fully sure what it's about.  I also got a short called, "The Great American Foreclosure Crisis" because I am a huge nerd.
So, what do you and your significant other do that is just weird, funny, or out there?  Link up with Dog Hair is an AccessoryAnother Clean Slate, and The Pinot Project to share all of your favorite crazies!


  1. hahaha love reading all this! I still can't believe you have kleenex everywhere

  2. I love this...I have been known to leave Kleenex in bed.

    I switched my Amazon one-click to my personal checking account instead of our joint because I got tired of answering questions. Yes I bought 50 Shades of Gray, no I did not read it yet, and YES it is about what you think it is about.

  3. I am totally going to buy you some plastic cups!! I buy the weirdest books on my Kindle too- because I always buy the cheap ones!

  4. this is hilarious! my hubby also takes super long showers sometimes, i don't get it! it will also take him 15 mins to brush his teeth and wash his face at night. seriously?!?! :)

  5. this is awesome! I am the same way with tissues and it drives my fiancé crazy!


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